Below you will find our collection of inspirational, wise, and humorous
old P. J. O'rourke quotes, P. J. O'rourke sayings, and P. J. O'rourke proverbs, collected over the years from a variety
of sources.'
Fascism is very much a mob movement.P. J. O'Rourke
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Cleanliness becomes more important when godliness is unlikely.P. J. O'Rourke
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Everybody wants to save the Earth; nobody wants to help Mom do the dishes.P. J. O'Rourke
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Vegetables are something God invented to let women get even with their children.P. J. O'Rourke
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Don't send funny greeting cards on birthdays or at Christmas. Save them for funerals when their cheery effect is needed.P. J. O'Rourke
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A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine, something brussel sprouts never do.P. J. O'Rourke
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The very existence of the bicycle is an offense to reason and wisdom.P. J. O'Rourke
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When you think of the good old days, think one word: dentistry.P. J. O'Rourke
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A charity ball is like a dance except it's tax deductible.P. J. O'Rourke
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Personally, I believe a rocking hammock, a good cigar, and a tall gin-and-tonic is the way to save the planet.P. J. O'Rourke
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A hat should be taken off when you greet a lady and left off for the rest of your life. Nothing looks more stupid than a hat.P. J. O'Rourke
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Only a few good leaders have paused to reflect seriously on being leaders.P. J. O'Rourke
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A humorist doesn't really do that much note-taking.P. J. O'Rourke
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Being a humorist is not a voluntary thing. You can tell this because in a situation where saying a funny thing will cause a lot of trouble, a humorist will still say the funny thing. No matter how inappropriate.P. J. O'Rourke
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No humorist is under any obligation to provide answers and probably if you were to delve into the literary history of humour it's probably all about not providing answers because the humorist essentially says: this is the way things are.P. J. O'Rourke
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A good bachelor drinks his dessert (and sometimes the rest of his meals). A sweet tooth is a danger signal that you're getting too much exercise and not enough cocktails.P. J. O'Rourke
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Not much was really invented during the Renaissance, if you don't count modern civilization.P. J. O'Rourke
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In the Soviet Union, no industry went under until they all did.P. J. O'Rourke
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Harvard is the home of American ideas.P. J. O'Rourke
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The Tea Party has definitely increased political involvement, not only among Tea Party members but among people who oppose the Tea Party members. It's been a general stimulus. P. J. O'Rourke
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More modern poetry is written than read.P. J. O'Rourke
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You know your children are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they're going.P. J. O'Rourke
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Anyway, no drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, greed and love of power.P. J. O'Rourke
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Fretting about overpopulation, is a perfectly guilt free indeed, sanctimonious way for progressives to be racists.P. J. O'Rourke
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The C student starts a restaurant. The A student writes restaurant reviews.P. J. O'Rourke
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Family love is messy, clinging, and of an annoying and repetitive pattern, like bad wallpaper.P. J. O'Rourke
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Smoking is very bad for you and should only be done because it looks so good. People who don't smoke have a terrible time finding something polite to do with their lips.P. J. O'Rourke
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Guns are always the best method for a private suicide. They are more stylish looking than single-edged razor blades and natural gas has gotten so expensive. Drugs are too chancy. You might mistake the dosage and just have a good time. P. J. O'Rourke
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Smoking is very bad for you and should only be done because it looks so good. People who don't smoke have a terrible time finding something polite to do with their lips.P. J. O'Rourke