Funny Movie Sayings and Quotes

Below you will find our collection of inspirational, wise, and humorous old funny movie quotes, funny movie sayings, and funny movie proverbs, collected over the years from a variety of sources.


First rule of leadership: everything is your fault.     

A Bug's Life

Husbands should be like Kleenex: soft, strong, and disposable.     

Clue (1985)

Some people play hard to get. I play hard to want.

The Adventures of Ford Fairlane (1990) – Ford Fairlane (Andrew Dice Clay)

Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.

The Godfather, Part II (1974)

All I've ever wanted was an honest week's pay for an honest day's work.

Bilko

I have strong feelings about gun control. If there's a gun around, I want to be controlling it.     

Clint Eastwood in Pink Cadillac - 1989

If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you.

Winnie the Pooh

I'm bigger than you and higher up the food chain. Get in my belly.

Mike Myers in Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me - 1999

You know, it takes two to get one in trouble.

She Done Him Wrong (1933)

A bird may love a fish, Signore, but where would they live?

Danielle (Drew Barrymore) in “EverAfter”

What exactly is the function of a rubber duck?

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (2002)

Do you know how hard it is to find a decent man in this town? Most of them think monogamy is some kind of wood.

Peggy Brandt (Amy Yasbeck) in The Mask

Fish are friends, not food.

Barry Humphries in Finding Nemo - 2003

Do or do not, there is no try.     

Jedi Master Yoda in Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back

May the Force be with you.

Star Wars

When women go wrong, men go right after them.

Mae West

Get busy living or get busy dying.

Tiffany

Death cannot stop true love, it can only delay it for a little while.

Westley (Cary Elwes) in “The Princess Bride.

I live at home with my parents. It's just temporary ... 'til they die.     

Gordon (Kevin Kirkpatrick), Gamers (2006)

You can't handle the truth!     

A Few Good Men

I make up a new dance move. It's called the “move on with your life".

Will Ferrell

You can put a cat in an oven, but that don't make a biscuit.     

White Men Can't Jump

You'll live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to.

Interiors (1978)

The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides...     

Samuel L. Jackson in Pulp Fiction - 1994

What's the difference between a wife and a job? After 10 years a job still sucks.

What Woman Want – 2000

Insanity runs in my family. It practically gallops.

Arsenic and Old Lace (1944)

Some things are not meant to last, they just take a place in your heart and make you smarter the next time.

Alex and Emma

Yeah... you're a legend in your own mind.

Clint Eastwood in Dirty Harry - 1971

You know how men are. They think ‘No' means ‘Yes' and ‘Get lost' means ‘Take me, I'm yours.'

Meg, Hercules

Truth hurts. Maybe not as much as jumping on a bicycle with a seat missing, but it hurts.

Lt. Frank Drebin (Leslie Nielsen) in Naked Gun 2½: The Smell of Fear