Jon Stewart Sayings and Quotes

Below you will find our collection of inspirational, wise, and humorous old jon stewart quotes, jon stewart sayings, and jon stewart proverbs, collected over the years from a variety of sources.


I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land.     

Jon Stewart

Insomnia is my greatest inspiration.     

Jon Stewart

I want to look back on my career and be proud of the work, and be proud that I tried everything.     

Jon Stewart

I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land.     

Jon Stewart

You just have to keep trying to do good work, and hope that it leads to more good work. I want to look back on my career and be proud of the work, and be proud that I tried everything. Yes, I want to look back and know that I was terrible at a variety of things.     

Jon Stewart

Fatherhood is great because you can ruin someone from scratch.     

Jon Stewart

Nobody out-rednecks the great state of America.     

Jon Stewart

The internet is just a world passing notes around a classroom.     

Jon Stewart

Fatherhood is great because you can ruin someone from scratch.     

Jon Stewart

Every generation has their challenge. And things change rapidly, and life gets better in an instant.     

Jon Stewart

Democrats always standing up for what they later realize they should have believed in.     

Jon Stewart

The best-laid plans of mice and comedians usually wind up on the cutting-room floor.     

Jon Stewart

You can use your idealism to further your aims, if you realize that nothing is Nirvana, nothing is perfect.     

Jon Stewart

The danger of oppression is not just being oppressed, it's becoming an oppressor.     

Jon Stewart

The Internet is just a world passing around notes in a classroom.     

Jon Stewart

Ah, the first rule of public speaking -- always start with a joke.     

Jon Stewart

It's harder to eat meat when you know the animal's name...I have found.     

Jon Stewart

Senior year is supposed to be about being mentally done.     

Jon Stewart

I want to look back on my career and be proud of the work, and be proud that I tried everything.     

Jon Stewart

Religion. It's given people hope in a world torn apart by religion.     

Jon Stewart

The problem with the Tea Party is they're all ignorant hillbillies who drink moonshine and ride around on mules. And they believe in stereotypes too.     

Jon Stewart