Dental Sayings and Quotes

Love visiting the dentist? Didn’t think so. While necessary for our well being and dental hygiene, a pending dental appointment can spark feelings of dread and anxiety. If going to the dentist gives you the creeps, you’ll enjoy the collection of humorous dental quotes below.


Faced with the choice of enduring a bad toothache or going to the dentist, we generally tried to ride out the bad tooth.     

Joseph Barbera

Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill.     

Johnny Carson

Some tortures are physical And some are mental, But the one that is both Is dental.     

Ogden Nash

Dentist: a prestidigitator who, putting metal into your mouth, pulls coin out of your pocket.     

Ambrose Bierce

If suffering brought wisdom, the dentist's office would be full of luminous ideas.     

Mason Cooley

It was a sweet smile, but it hid menace, like the kind dentists gave.     

Andy Paine

My dental hygienist is cute. Every time I visit, I eat a whole package of Oreo cookies while waiting in the lobby. Sometimes she has to cancel the rest of the afternoon's appointments.     

Steven Wright

I told my dentist my teeth are going yellow. He told me to wear a brown tie.     

Rodney Dangerfield

An aching tooth is better out than in. To lose a rotting member is a gain.     

Richard Baxter

I wonder if there's such a thing as a spiritual dentist? I think my whole personality is full of cavities!     

Charles M. Schulz

Blessed are they who hold lively conversations with the helplessly mute, for they shall be called dentists.     

Ann Landers

I was never afraid of anything in the world except the dentist.     

Taylor Caldwell

I won't have to brush my teeth or floss tonight. Any food trapped in my teeth got knocked out.     

Charles Thomas

Good dental care doesn't make you a good student, but if your tooth hurts, it's hard to be a good student.     

Geoffrey Canada

When life is kicking others in the teeth, Become a dentist.     

Kevin Myers

Be true to your teeth and they won't be false to you.     

Soupy Sales

A dentist at work in his vocation always looks down in the mouth.     

George D. Prentice

If a patient cannot clean his teeth, no dentist can clean them for him.     

Martin H. Fischer

Brush your teeth everyday, To keep dentist away.     

Anonymous

A dentist gets to the root of the problem.     

Anonymous

I was a left-handed dentist who made people cry.     

Casey Stengel

My dentist is actually a highly technical specialist, constantly experimenting with the latest dental research. The equipment he has makes my old dentist look prehistoric.     

Joelle Carter

Smile, it lets your teeth breathe.     

Anonymous

Trips to the dentist I like to postpone that kind of thing.     

Johnny Depp

No, my friend, I am not drunk. I have just been to the dentist, and need not return for another six months! Is it not the most beautiful thought?     

Agatha Christie

You mean people pay you to do this to them? I thought you had captured these people and brought them here against their will! How do I become a dentist?     

Michael Buckley

It seemed far more reasonable to belong to a species that had evolved natural tooth replacement than to belong to one that had developed the dental profession.     

Elisabeth Tova Bailey

My father told me what it used to feel like, waiting in the dentist's office. Every time the nurse opened the door you thought, It's happening. The thing I've been afraid of all my life.     

Philip K. Dick

A gold tooth is to some blacks, what braces are to all whites.     

Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Men often think submission indicates weakness, that letting someone else take charge betrays a character deficit. But we all submit to strangers who drill into our teeth as long as we can see the parchment on their wall which reads 'Dentist.'     

Edmond Manning

Eyes are the windows to the soul. A smile is the mirror of the heart.     

Janna Cachola

Math anxiety is worst than a regular check up at the dentist.     

Charmaine J. Forde

Smiling is fun with healthy teeth & gums.     

Prof. Dr. Ninad Moon

No one can take our smiles away when dental decay is kept miles away.     

Prof. Dr. Ninad Moon

It's actually harder to get into dental school than medical school.     

Dan Goor

Poor dental hygiene can be fatal.     

Rand C. Capp

Love conquests aren't dental check-ups.     

Sasha Valenti

Meth addicts are known for their good dental hygiene.     

Ryan George

I always notice a person's smile. I'm a dental hygienist.     

Winifred Hervey

Roses are red, Violets are Blue, They'll need dental records to identify you.     

Tom Savage

You realize that tampering with your kids dental records is against the law.     

Sheldon Krasner

Smart decision. You should avoid sweets. After all, you just signed away your dental insurance.     

Tony Kushner

When she got done with my father, he could only be identified by his dental records.     

J.J. Abrams

Roses are red, violets are blue. It's time for your dental cleaning and maybe a checkup, too.     

Greg Daniels

You wait for me enough times out on the street though, you might owe me some dental work.     

Mike Binder

I've got a dentist who's over seven feet tall / Yes I've got a dentist who's over seven feet tall / Long John they call him, and he answers every call     

Tommy George

Say you're supposed to see your dentist / About twice a year, that's right / But I think I feel it bobbing / Yes I'll go back there tonight     

Tommy George

I'd rather pick flowers instead of fights / And rather than flaunt my style / I'd flash you a smile / Of clean pearly whites.     

Adam R. Young

I've been to the dentist a thousand times so I know the drill / I smooth my hair / Sit back in the chair / But somehow I still get the chills     

Adam R. Young

When hygienists / Leave on long vacations / That's when dentists scream and / Lose their patience     

Adam R. Young

Talking only brings the toothaches on because / I say the stupidest things / So if my results go south, I swallow my pride with an aspirin and shut my mouth     

Adam R. Young

I'm always amazed to hear of air crash victim so badly mutilated that they have to be identified by their dental records. What I can't understand is, if they don't know who you are, how do they know who your dentist is?     

Geoff Tibbals

I'm always amazed to hear of air crash victim so badly mutilated that they have to be identified by their dental records. What I can't understand is, if they don't know who you are, how do they know who your dentist is?     

Paul Merton

I go to a woman dentist. It's a relief to be told to open my mouth instead of shut it.     

Bob Monkhouse

Sitting in the dentist's chair / Wishing that I wasn't there / To forget and pass the time / I have made this bit of rhyme.     

Robert William Service

My dentist had a powerful wrist / He tries and tries in vain / To make me grunt or groan or squeal / With probe or rasp or drill.     

Robert William Service

Sitting in the dental chair / Don't you wish you weren't there / Well, your cup of woe to fill / Just think of his infernal bill.     

Robert William Service

Beyond brushing, the internal factors that nourish the teeth are so important: eating real foods, hormonal balanced, minerals, fat-soluble vitamins, and healthy fluid exchange through the teeth.     

Nadine Artemis

Stress, processed foods, and inadequate nutrition negatively affect dental fluid flow.     

Nadine Artemis

Nutrition is also a significant factor that influences the development of the entire mouth, not just the teeth, and it should include a healthy prenatal diet, breast-feeding, and raising children on real, unprocessed food.     

Nadine Artemis

Babies are generally born without teeth, yet their teeth are already forming.     

Nadine Artemis

In ancient times, cavities in children were a rare occurrence. Today, one of the biggest health concerns in North America and Europe affecting little ones more than any other age group is dental decay, or early childhood caries.     

Nadine Artemis

The role of a dentist is to preserve and prevent oral diseases of teeth, hum and jaws and supporting structures.     

Vijay Tare

Dentistry is the science and art of preventing and controlling the dental disease.     

Vijay Tare

The teeth give a sound support with the help of jaw bones to facial structures.     

Vijay Tare

The teeth protect the dust, germs and any foreign objects entering in the mouth with the help of lips.     

Vijay Tare

The teeth give a sound support with the help of jaw bones to facial structures.     

Vijay Tare

Dental hygiene is the study of preventive oral healthcare including the management of behaviors to prevent oral disease and promote health.     

Michele Leonardi Darby

Some people who can skirt precipices without a tremor have a strong dread of the dentist's chair.     

C.C. Gaither

All dentists talk while they work. They have inherited this from their professional ancestors, the barbers.     

C.C. Gaither

Dentist, A man with more pull than a politician.     

C.C. Gaither

Dentist, A man who always tries not to get on your nerves.     

C.C. Gaither

Her snow-white teeth are, not a little, tinged with the jet; To the dentist she must go, And repair the upper row, Then haply she may run a chance of marriage yet.     

William Watt

No one would disagree that it would be better to maintain oral health throughout life, never to have had any kind of dental disease.     

Wiley-Blackwell