Santa Sayings and Quotes

Below you will find our collection of inspirational, wise, and humorous old santa quotes, santa sayings, and santa proverbs, collected over the years from a variety of sources.


Santa Claus has the right idea – visit people only once a year.     

Victor Borge

Santa is our culture's only mythic figure truly believed in by a large percentage of the population. It's a fact that most of the true believers are under eight years old, and that's a pity.     

Chris Van Allsburg

Our family was too strange and weird for even Santa Claus to come visit… Santa, who was jolly – but, let’s face it, he was also very judgmental.     

Julia Sweeney

There are three stages of man: he believes in Santa Claus; he does not believe in Santa Claus; he is Santa Claus.     

Bob Phillips

Here's what we know about Santa. He sees you when you're sleeping. He knows when you're awake. He knows if you've been bad or good. I think he's with the NSA.     

David Letterman

The Santa myth is one of the most effective means ever devised for intimidating children, eroding their self- esteem, twisting their behavior, warping their values, and slowing their development of critical thinking skills.     

Tom Flynn

The greatest thing is not to believe in Santa Claus; it is to be Santa Claus.     

Pat Boone

Once you stop believing in Santa Claus, the whole world just goes downhill.     

Tom Clancy

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.     

George Carlin

Everybody has the idea of Santa in their head and in their heart.     

Mick Foley

Everything that you want Santa to be, he is.      

Mick Foley

History is like Santa Claus: a language construction. We have some registers about the existence of Santa and history - the presents under the tree, the archives - but none have really seen them.     

Alvaro Enrigue

All the world is happy when Santa Claus comes.     

Maud Lindsay

Whenever you give someone a present or sing a holiday song, you're helping Santa Claus. To me, that's what Christmas is all about. Helping Santa Claus!     

Louis Sachar

God put Santa Claus on earth to remind us that Christmas is 'sposed to be a happy time.     

Bil Keane

The Santa Claus principle liquidates itself.     

Ludwig Von Mises

Growing up, Santa Claus would cover the presents with a white blanket, so when we'd wake up Christmas morning, we had to wait for my dad to do the big reveal of all the presents Santa brought.     

Martina Mcbride

Maybe Santa Claus is real. Here's the problem: reality.     

David Remnick