Vodka Sayings and Quotes

Below you will find our collection of inspirational, wise, and humorous old vodka quotes, vodka sayings, and vodka proverbs, collected over the years from a variety of sources.

There's no absolutes in life, only vodka.     

Mick Jagger

Vodka is a very deceptive drink. You can't taste it, you can't smell it.     

Dylan Moran

Once we hit forty, women only have about four taste buds left: one for vodka, one for wine, one for cheese, and one for chocolate.     

Gina Barreca

Vodka is tasteless going down, but it is memorable coming up.     

Garrison Keillor

They say milk gives u strength. Drink three glasses and try moving a wall. You can't. Drink three shots of vodka and it moves all by itself.     


If wine is fruit, then vodka must be a vegetable.     

Jann Arden

We drank our coffee the Russian way. That is to say we had vodka before it and vodka afterwards.     

Philip Sington

Vodka is like water, but with consequences.     

Tom Rachman

The key factor in the vodka category is smoothness, and smoothness is what our vodka has.     

Fuzzy Zoeller

Vodka does not ease back pain. But it does get your mind off it.     

Fuzzy Zoeller

Vodka is a wonderful drink. You can drink so much of it without being as hung over as you would if you were drinking one of the brown liquors the whiskeys and such. It's a great drink to go with appetizers.     

Gary Shteyngart

Vodka eyeballing sounds great, but it's a slippery slope. Next, you'll be scotch nostriling, tequila nippling and, before you know it, Jager tainting.     

Stephen Colbert

The relationship between a Russian and a bottle of vodka is almost mystical.     

Richard Owen

Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life.     

Samuel Johnson